Random things about life

1) My birthday was last Tuesday. I am now 27. Don't know quite how I feel about it.

2) I got a Kindle Fire for my birthday. That is one really great reason to be 27.

3) I love sitting outside by the fire with my husband. Hands down favorite thing right now.

4) Aidan's last day of preschool is tomorrow. Don't know how I feel about that one either. Hello summer!

5) We went swimming a lot this past weekend and Nora is now jumping in the water like a fish. Guess she won't spend the summer on the sidelines.

6) Went out for a lovely dessert with friends to celebrate my birthday and it was scrumptious. Being with friends was even better. And...I wore my new dress Seth bought for me. Love.

7) Starting a mom's ministry this summer. Watch out, here we go.

8) I've been sewing a lot. 

9) My sister is coming to visit tomorrow. I am driving to Savannah, GA to pick her up. Yay!

10) Life has been busy, but good. Very good. Very busy. I am so blessed.

11) Oh, and I like ice cream...a lot. 

12) And I think my kids are cute. More to come on that one.

Mother's Day Dresses

So, I'v had this really pretty fabric (not sure what it is except it isn't cotton) stashed away in my craft drawer for awhile. I bought like 3 or 4 yards of it because it was only 1.50/yd and I remember thinking at the time that I wanted to sew a skirt with it.

I have been pinning tutorials for those DIY tank top dresses for awhile. There are several way to do this simple project, so I pooled my resources and got to it.

Here is the link I used primarily:
http://www.stamp48.com/2011/07/25/diy-tank-top-dress-tutorial/

And a few more that I also looked at:
http://papernstitchblog.com/2011/08/16/how-to-make-an-insanely-cute-dress-on-a-shoestring-budget-tutorial/
http://raegunwear.blogspot.com/2011/05/sonp-tutorial-upcycled-shirt-to-dress.html
http://elleapparel.blogspot.com/2010/06/nautical.html

I think the main thing to consider when starting out on this project is whether or not you are going to use elastic. After looking through many different tutorials, I decided on using elastic because I wanted the ease of getting the dress on and off.

Your basic requirements for this dress:

Fabric that  is as wide as 1.5-2x your waist and long enough to suit your preferences. I used about 1.5 times my waist as the measurement because I didn't want my skirt to be super full. The more you use, the fuller the skirt.

Elastic (this can be as thick as you want, but I used 5/8" elastic)

And a t-shirt or tank top of your choice

The details:


1) Determine the width of the dress and then cut out your pieces. (Once you determine how wide you want the skirt to be cut it in half, so you have two identical pieces).

2) Sew up the sides length-wise (right sides together).

3) To make a casing, I would check out the first tutorial because she took great pictures and it is easy to follow!

4) The hardest part is going to be lining up your shirt and skirt and sewing it. I found that putting the skirt over my knees and stretching out the elastic made it easier for me to pin the shirt on it. For Nora's dress, I had my husband help me and that was even easier!

5) For my "sash/belt" I used ribbon with velcro sewed in the back. Nora's sash was made out of the fabric and I also made her a ruffle flower hair clip.

And here are some fun outtakes from our mini photo shoot before church:

"It's so nice that you can do that"

I feel like I get a lot of interesting responses to my staying home with the children. It's not like it's a foreign concept, but when I am asked "What do you do?" and my reply is, "I stay at home with my children," the general response is "It's so nice that you can do that."

Honestly, I struggle with how to answer to this. Usually, I nod, and say, "Yes, it is a privilege."

BUT....

I want to say a lot more.

I feel like a lot of people imagine that if you are staying home then your husband must make a ton of money to support your family and that it is so nice that you are able to do that. I get that vibe a lot. Oh, how nice for you! You are able to stay home and don't need to work because your one income meets all your needs. 


HOWEVER,

the truth of the matter is that I choose to stay home with my children and it is not without its sacrifices. Staying home with my children means not having cable, or a smart phone, driving a car that is 10+ years old, not having 2 vehicles (thankfully, we do now), not going out to eat very often (unless it's free, cheap, or with coupons), not eating as much meat, not buying things new, and so much more. And I am okay with that. I don't need a lot of those things. I enjoy buying things used and I am not ashamed to shop at garage sales. I am okay with driving an older car and I am okay with making whatever financial sacrifices possible to be at home. It is a privilege, but one that I have deemed important enough to make happen. I believe that most people can make it work and can make that choice too. I realize that some situations are more difficult than others, but we have been in difficult financial situations where my having a full-time job seemed the best answer and we still didn't jump on board. I value this time with my children. I don't want to give that to anyone else. I don't want to miss these moments. And I don't think I'll ever look back and wish I had more money or less financial stress (would be nice for sure). I will however regret not spending these years with my family.

I realize this post may be controversial and offensive to some. It is really just the way I see things and I understand that others don't agree. I don't think any less of my mom friends that work outside of the home. I personally know that I could not balance both and feel like I was giving enough to my family. So, for me, this works.

It's not easy, but for our family, it's what's best.

20 months: A letter

Nora,

You are a hoot! I selected this picture because it sums you up so well right now. You are expressive, funny, and you enjoy life to the fullest. You have us laughing all the time.

You are turning into such a big girl these days. You want to do everything your brother does and it is really sweet to watch you imitate him (as long as it's good behavior). You want to eat your meals at the big table and sometimes I let you even though you are much more easily contained in your highchair still. You have started to ask to use the potty and have been successful at going, but I am not quite ready to train you yet. You are putting yourself to sleep now for both naptime and bedtime. And you are communicating really well. You repeat most words and some phrases too. You love to repeat what Aidan says the most.

You have decided not to  be afraid of water anymore which is great! You love the baby pool and you loved the lake when we went last weekend. You are becoming quite the little fish!

You are adventurous, but also cautious. You are silly and shy. You are expressive and you are still. You are loud and you are quiet. You are cuddly and you are busy.

You love reading books lately and have a great attention span for some of our longer books. I think you love just sitting with Aidan and listening to me read because it makes you feel grown up somehow. You interact a lot with the books and seem to follow some of the stories too.

You love Dora and Woody (Toy Story)! You are very expressive when you watch tv and you really like to watch a movie in the car on long drives (this is nice because it keeps you from fussing the whole time).

You love your new baby "La la" and you sleep with 3 babies, one "doll," and sometimes a few books and blankets too. You crib is always full of things and I usually go in after you fall asleep and take some of the stuff out. You love to talk to your babies until you fall asleep. And speaking of sleep, you are sleeping so well. You are our late morning person and usually sleep until about 8-8:30 most mornings. Too bad some of that doesn't rub off on your brother! I think you sleep so late because we put you to bed later than we did Aidan at this age. You have always been a night owl and can seem to stay up forever.

You love to play outside and you say "play" every time you see a fast food restaurant with a play place. You like the nursery at church and you really want to go to preschool with Aidan.

I almost always hear from others that you are so pleasant, content, easily entertained, and very easy going. Which is true as long as you have your way and plenty of food to eat. :) You still love eating more than any other activity and you are quite the little chunk. We love it!

You are a blessing and such a fun sweet girl to be around!

Love,

Mama

Growing Out of Failure

There are lots of times where I feel like if I could make a list of all my shortcomings, they would definitely outnumber the few meager accomplishments I may have.

Lately, I have found myself wallowing in some sort of self-induced pity over my current inability to "get it together." Honestly, I don't know what "it" I am trying to "get together", but the two things just don't seem to want to match up.

 I take mental pictures of all my failures: laundry stacked up in the bedroom needing to be put away, toys scattered throughout rooms, sticky floors from cups spilling, an unloaded dishwasher, a pitiful supper thrown together at the last minute, walls without decoration, cards waiting to be addressed and stuck in the mail, beds unmade, smudged mirrors, a ring around a bathtub. I think you get the picture...or pictures. It isn't pretty to me. It feels less than...like I am incapable of having a nice orderly home where I haven't left a Happy Birthday sign hanging for a month (no exaggeration there-Aidan just asked me why I took it down and wanted to know if it wasn't his birthday anymore).

Then there are things you can't take pictures of: nasty attitudes, screaming children, ungratefulness, bitterness, irrational words spoken, anger that bubbles over, mini meltdowns, constant bickering between siblings... And it feels again like failure.

My fault.

I should have this down. I need to get it together.

Why do I yell right at the end of my prayer for help? Why can I not calmly respond to my child's constant demands? Why is it so hard?

It might just be that it is. It might be that it won't change. It might be that no matter how hard I work and how much I try to appear more "together" there really is no way to attain that. Maybe I am not supposed to. Maybe I need to shift my focus. Stop tearing myself down. Maybe if I looked through a different lens, saw the beauty in the midst of the ugly, maybe then I would change.

It may not be so hard to be who I need to be if I could stop making myself less than I am. I need to accept the way things appear and accept who I am in the middle of it all. I need to be okay with imperfection. I need to allow myself to be human, to need grace, to fight for love even when so much seems unlovely.

I love knowing that's how grace works. From the way it appears, I don't deserve a whole lot, but grace comes in and says that I am enough. Grace says that I can make it through another day and that maybe this time I will be just a little more patient. Grace says that there is forgiveness for the things that happened yesterday, there is even more for those that will happen today, and more available tomorrow.

So, I don't have to get my "it" together. Nothing I do to work towards those things will bring the ultimate glory. There is no prize for the cutest house or the most well-behaved children. I just need to focus on my Savior, follow His lead.

May my ultimate prize be that I learned how to love during the unlovely moments, that I learned to forgive myself for my "failures," that I let go of my need for control and order and simply let grace take its place in my life.