One wig please...

...and some tape to hold up my dress.

This day has been full of enough hair pulling that I think I might actually be bald.

Okay, it's not that bad, but close. Aidan's behavior was pretty much over the top ridiculous and my patience was a little on the low end of the spectrum.

WHERE ARE THOSE EARS CHILD? DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE WASTING MY TIME?

I don't even know why I asked those things of my two year old today because all I got was fingers pointing to the ears and a blank stare. Wasting time? What is that? Don't you know it is what toddlers do best?

I was in no mood to be messed with today, but that is what I got. My child forgot how to listen....to ANYTHING.

I threatened, I talked firmly, I looked him in the eye, I drug him off the playground while he screamed and carried on.

He ran away a lot today. Just ran. Apparently, it was opposite day and nobody told me about it. Doesn't "STAY WITH MOMMY" mean to run the other way?

The only advice I have for myself on this one is....DON'T WEAR A STRAPLESS MAXI DRESS WHILE DEALING WITH PROBLEMATIC CHILDREN.

If you are like me, you will find yourself in the Wal-mart parking lot with your dress down below your bra, or have your child help you pull it down in the park and make an announcement about your "boos."

JUST DON'T DO IT. I am so serious.

These type of dresses are not for people who take care of rebellious two year olds and 10 month old babies. Oh, and forget that they are super comfortable for your 5 month pregnant self, just forget about it.

But, if you do wear one of those dresses, and it does fall down, just be too absorbed in dealing with your child to even notice...that pretty much keeps you from feeling any sort of embarrassment about the situation. And once you put that sweet little one in bed, just eat a HUGE bowl of ice cream with fresh strawberries and some chocolate. That should do it.